141209

The Finale of the fourth installment of Dexter:

Mindblowing way to end yet another awesome and complexity-ridden season. It's going to take some time to shake off that final scene (no spoilers here). Great way of foreshadowing what's to come in the fifth season. Avid fans are left to wonder how the aforementioned event will implicate our beloved sociopath. Oh gosh.. That final scene was just depressing. Now that's what you call GREAT TV. Rating: 10/10.

The Finale of the third installment of Californication:

Tearjerker. Heartwrenching. I'll give it a rating of 8/10.

121209

This time around, reactivating my Facebook account helped me arrive to the ultimate decision to permanently remove myself from this social network. For one thing, having been away from Facebook, for a total of.... 6 months this year made me realize that this website plays no relevant role in my life.

Okay, okay, before I continue, I will confess that I have once been a Facebook junkie and alot of the points that I'll be making can be used against me. But, the infamous "FIRST STEP" is after all, accepting/acknowledging that you have a problem lol.

I have tried to permanently deactivate my Facebook account months ago. I've deleted more than 300 people off my list. I've removed whatever applications I had installed. Deleted photo albums, and untagged myself off photos. Deleted photos of myself. Made my profile extremely private. The whole nine yards.

But there is a catch to deleting your Facebook account: There is a 2-week interval during which one must not log into their accounts in order for the deactivation to come through. Like seriously, how sly are the brains behind all this facebook farce? Most people end up logging into their accounts after only days of abstinence from Facebook. Such as myself. I usually activate my account for a period of 5 minutes before deactivating it again. But still, what a loser.

I now,use facebook for the sole purpose of "stalking" people. But really, have I just sunked to a new low? Man.

Not on Facebook to "stay in touch" with friends and acquaintances. That can be done via MSN or Skype or even Blogger.

Definitely not on Facebook to show off how totally awesome my life is. Cause it's anything but. My life is mainly a repetition of things I did yesterday, and a foreshadowing of what I will be doing tomorrow. Boring? Yeah. Not even posting photos of myself at parties or whatever is going to change that.

Not on Facebook to use pointless and time-wasting applications. Farmville, Restaurant City, Mafia Wars -- Really? What's the point of adding strangers you don't even give a shit about, just so you can move up the ladder at a world that doesn't exist?

Do I care about what people think and what they did in the weekend? No. Do I enjoy singing along to the lyrics posted in my friends' status messages? No. Do I derive utility from reading overused and unoriginal phrases like "I miss you sayang" and "I love you baby" over and over again? Hell no.

Do I think that people care about anything I'd have to say? Or what I think about "what's his face" or "what's her face"? Of course not. I am 100% sure noone gives a rat's ass about the thoughts that occur in my head and what I'd have to say about anything.

Not an important person, not popular, and not about to pursue a career in event planning. Hence, Facebook events is irrelevant to me. Who gives a crap about whether I like Californication, or Dexter, or Adidas, or Colin Firth? Noone. Why would I join an interest group in which people are only interested to bash each other instead of providing positive inputs of any sort.

That said, I'm ready to rid off my Facebook account (Twitter, Plurk and Tumbler too for that matter) and pursue what might be a socially reclusive life in which I'd actually have to shake a person's hands (Dear God!!) and talk to them on a face-to-face basis (The Horror!!). Moments of awkward silence and brain farts await me, BoY oH bOy, aM i ExCiTeD!

031209 (II)

Awh! Feeling so sentimental right now...

My favorite class for this semester had just ended.. And my instructor told us, his students, that he was resigning and will be traveling to his motherland. Sadness, I'll really miss him alot. He's such a fun professor :(

And teka siapa lagi yang i will be missing.

Specimen abc!!!

somehow hatiku rasa sangat pilu ni tika memikirkan yang sia ndakan boleh jumpa dia lagi dan melihat mukanya yang selalu blur ataupun stress ataupun mengantuk. Sepatutnya sia cakap lah selamat tinggal kah apa.. bodohnya sia.. argh i will miss you!

fare thee well............. thanks for being a great part of my semester :)

031209

cant sleep, then blog i shall. writing this while i am super mengantuk tapi tidak dapat tidur = high.

really oughta be studying now, but i think ive used up whatever energy i had left cramming for my german test, which i managed to execute fairly well i reckon. all in all, this was a happy day for me, to the extent that i felt as though its illegal to be as happy as i was today. anyway, on the way home, i started thinking about how i answered the questions for the quiz and i realized that i totally screwed up one question.

so for this question, we had to write our predictions for the future for particular individuals as indicated in the question. so one of the individual we had to make predictions for/about was "Der Prasidente von der Amerika" = Obama. I intended to write: The president will stil be the first black president of the USA. of course that sounds silly in english, but hey im still learning german so noone's expecting a full-on awesome german sentence.

and then instead of black = schwartz, i wrote schweize: shit. The sentence i constructed now carries the meaning: The president will still be the first shit president of the USA. DAMN!!! i have made a royal embarrassment of myself, but i still have the oral exam on friday so ill clarify that part to my professor, just in case she thinks that i was being crude on purpose.

and reactivated my fb for a bit to check on Specimen ABC, who is the manusia yang makes my insides feel like jelly setiap kali sia nampak dia. so specimen abc, ketika sia baru kenal dia, came off as being too nonchalant and didnt seem to care much about studies. well i mean first impression shouldnt be the sole basis for anyone to judge a person kan.


tapi ketika baru-baru kenal kan, ini orang memang lah.. tidur dalam kelas, and macam blur-blur saja selalu, and then specimen abc bilang dia dapat B- untuk ni satu course yang sia tengah ambil. and i replied.. oh okay bah kan tu? and dia reply, nah B- cukup bagus untuk saya.. then sia tanya dia about matematik course. then sia bilang lah, for sure ko memang hebat ni kan. then dia jawab, ah tidaklah.. punya teruk sia ni. im a judgemental arsehole, so right there and then, i deduced yang dia ini jenis yang memang tidak peduli sangat pasal sekolah (or anything for that matter)

then of course i was proven wrong cause specimen abc dapat lima puluh tiga markah untuk this one project yang markah penuhnya actually is lima puluj. Tiga markah extra wei, like who does that. and then sia nampak another quiz in which specimen abc mendapat 100%. and i was like wow.. punya siok kena proven wrong hahaha...

so entah mengapa, maybe the law of phsyics can explain this lah, i just think that specimen abc is the awesomest person ever. macam 90% perfect dari pandanganku. oh senyuman kencang itu! lepas itu muka yang either blur atau stress, wow punya lah adorable. cara pemakaian : i like. and dia masih guna pencil kayu, cutenya. mungkin dia penipu ataupun terlalu humble bila dia act macam dia ini bukan seorang manusia pandai.

anyway.. sia check lah profilnya. and then sia realize yang dia ni more than 90% perfect. hidupnya....... perfect. what the heck. macam the specimen abc yang sia kenal baru-baru is so totally not the person that i thought specimen abc was. specimen abc seems to have accomplished quite alot. wah and sekali lagi sia rasa macam permainan sims in which i am the sim, and that Person who created me enjoys playing me and creating crazy scenarios in which i have no control.

well this too shall pass. but until then, sia memang asthma lah setiap kali nampak dia.

okay im ready to sleep, shall be getting a solid 2 hour sleep before i start cramming again.

261109

Kau sangat bikin panas!

Please don't act like I'm the orang jahat in this situation.

Bukan saya yang memilih untuk bersama dalam kumpulan sama kau, tapi kau yang membuat keputusan itu. If there's anyone who earned the right to bitch, orang itu adalah saya. Saya tidak mendapat bantuan yang mencukupi dari kau, dan kau bergantung sama sia for everything. Sial. Who is the orang dewasa in this situation? Sia kah kau?

Yah sia mengaku yang sia melakukan silap dalam tugasan ini juga, tapi jikalau ko pun jelas tentang apa yang perlu kita lakukan, memang for sure ko sudah address kesilapan sia kan. What does that mean? That means ko memang langsung tidak tahu apa-apa pun untuk tugasan ini dan langsung tidak memberi effort untuk cuba memahami. Jadi kenapa kau berabis bilang "Kita mesti dapat full mark untuk tugasan ini!". Kau langsung tidak menyumbang apa-apa pun.. Idea bernas tiada, upaya tiada, and please lah, tolong lah jangan guna alasan yang kamu tidak fasih bertutur inggeris!

And sekarang, kau acting macam kau yang di-victimized in this situation. Ah yah kah? Well, as I recall, sia berabis cakap sama kau, kita mesti jumpa sebanyak kali yang boleh sebelum kita melakukan perdebatan di kelas. SEBAB sia tahu yang sia tidak mampu untuk berdebat secara inpromptu. Sia perlu benar-benar bersedia untuk tugasan seperti itu. Kau pula terlalu confident yang kita boleh perform as good as orang lain. Yah well maybe we can. TAPI KITA MEMERLUKAN MASA LATIHAN YANG BANYAK UNTUK MENCAPAI KEADAAN SEDEMIKIAN! Dan kau langsung tidak buat apa-apa pun!

I really don't see how masalah ini berpunca dari saya, so jangan berharap yang saya akan adjust my behaviour to better suit YOUR needs.

221109

Now that I've only a few weeks left before the end of the semester, I'm constantly feeling tired from being bombarded with work here and there. Too many essays to write, too many academic journals to read, too many math assignments to struggle with and definitely too many German words to memorize. One very important knowledge that I have acquired is not to take up a language and a full on quantitative course when doing 5 subjects. Math and German are the two subjects that I'm sucking at for now. Oh and I have a debate tomorrow. SIGH.

Since I can't find anyone to rant to about this one problem I'm having, (why is noone on MSN anymore?), I'll just blog about it. I have to say that sia a bit kecewa dengan sia punya sahabat untuk debate assignment. Sia rasa macam tidak mendapat bantuan dari dia, dan, sia memang cuba untuk faham lah keadaan dia. Tapi takkanlah sia saja yang serious pasal this assignment. Yah sia faham lah yang dia mempunyai masalah dengan pertuturan dalam bahasa inggeris, tapi kan pada pendapat saya, kalau dia memang sudah tahu yang dia ada masalah bertutur dalam bahasa ini, dia patutlah menggunakan lebih masa untuk bersedia untuk assignment ini.

Bukan apa, tapi sia pun bukannya fasih sangat dalam bahasa ini, sia pun harus menggunakan banyak masa untuk memahami topik perbincangan. Tapi bila sia suggest untuk meluangkan lebih masa untuk bersedia bagi assignment ini, dia memberi alasan bahawa dia tidak mahu pergi ke perpustakaan pada hari Ahad. Tuhanku, sia betul-betul rasa seolah sia harus mengangkat tanggungjawab untuk kedua-dua kami. Dan sia pun merasa seperti dia pun expect macam tu. Astaga, sia tau lah dia kawan sia, tapi bila dia berlaku sedemikian, sia merasa seperti sia ini dipergunakan. Pasal inilah, ketika permulaan semester ini, sia mengelak untuk berada dalam kumpulan sama seperti dia. Tapi, sama juga dia sign up untuk bersama saya untuk ini assignment.

Ini adalah satu perlakuan yang sangatlah normal untuk Asians. Selalu ingin melekat sama orang-orang sendiri. Yah, tiada yang salah dengan perlakuan sedemikian. Tapi kan kita kan di negara asing, semestinya kita mengambil peluang ini untuk keluar dari comfort zone kita dan cuba berkomunkasi dengan mereka yang asal-usulnya berbeza. Sia sangat tidak puas hati dengan keadaan ini, dan banyak kali sia membuat muka tidak senang bersama dia sehingga dia pun boleh terasa. Tapi kan, susah betul untuk kestau dia, sebab dia 9 tahun lebih tua dari sia, dan juga kawan sia dan bekas teman serumah.

Tapi untuk sekarang, harus melupakan segala itu dan bersedia lah untuk besok. Hopefully it goes well, dan hopefully sia tidak payah bekerja sama dia untuk semester yang seterusnya.

That said, I really can't wait for this semester to end. I miss my family so much and it hurts that I won't be celebrating Christmas with them for 2 years now.

151109

Phew! Managed to solve 40 Calculus problems within a 24-hour period. Which is bad, if you are a Math Whiz that is. For a lousy critical thinker such as myself, that's quite an achievement lol.. I suck at Math!

Contemplating to permanently remove my Facebook account, Twitter, Plurk and maybe even Blogger. Probably will be using Tumblr only, considering that the aforementioned website's got a bit of this and that.

Tengok lah dulu....